Less anyone think that riding with brights on, flashing modulators and fancy tail lights are going to save your butt ... here is a reality check ... nothing is as good as dilligent, defensive riding.
You are EXACTLY right. My sister in law and her husband are both emergency service workers (she's a Paramedic, he's a police officer). They have BOTH been involved in accidents on the side of the road (vehicles hit by unwary drivers) and BOTH have stories about having to dodge cars.
Bright lights and such might help, but you have GOT to take responsibility for your bike. That is YOUR machine. Anything and everything that happens you are completely responsible for. It's right of weight, not right of way. You can be right and dead, or safe and inconvenienced. It doesn't matter if the light is green, the lane is yours, or the cage has a stop sign. You need to be in control of YOUR bike, and be ready to avoid situations. I firmly believe that most accidents could have been avoided with EITHER driver doing something differently. Not all, but most, and that something different is being more defensive.
Whiting aren't you a trucker? I'm sure you've experienced more than once people not seeing you in that big ol' thing. Some people just aren't paying attention, they just will NOT see you. A while back I was behind a girl in a trans am, we were coming up on a spot where the two lane road split into 'three' lanes and the right lane on our side became a turn lane. As I was coming over the hill and up behind her she was moving into the turn lane. Well, then I noticed she wasn't slowing down. Sure enough, BANG, she nailed a concrete median equipped with electrical junction box, telephone pole and stop signs and flipped end over end into the ditch in front of it. Thankfully, despite a horrific accident and absolute damage to her car (only one wheel was still attached and the engine was in the oncoming lane), she didn't have a scratch on her. Come to find out, she though the road had just split and she was moving over into the right lane. If a driver doesn't see a concrete median and the fact that there is no more road left in front of them (she never attempted to brake, she said she didn't know it was there until she hit it) then they won't see you no matter what they do!